Lil' Dave and the Villain (pt. 1)

“It’s nine forty PM and I’m in”, I spoke loud and clear to my walkie-talkie, that I had reached from an undefined position.

Keeping my walkie-talkie on me at all times, even while naked is a skill I got from FBI training. It has to do with anus flexibility.

Julie got a lil’ surprised. I was above her on our hotel room’s bed, and as a matter of fact, I was in.

“OK, search for the G spot”, yelled the walkie-talkie. I started poking around, looking for a spongy location, one to two inches above the main entrance.

“I got it, I got it”, whispered to the walkie-talkie, while Julie started screaming. “For God’s sake Dave, its an undercover mission, you gotta act silently, make her stop”.

At that point, lil’ Dave was really upset. I was really hard to keep him from sneezing. I mean really hard. Not hard like Driving from LA to NY without tires, hard like listening to Primus and doing Yoga. So he sneezed and I passed out.

Woke up tied on a chair.

- "I faked it", Julie said, sitting on Moriarthur's knees.
- "Fuck, I knew it", I was refering both to Moriarthur's plan and Julie's fake orgasm. 

And I was like “Shit dude, I was sure she came”.

I guess I have to get my priorities straight.